Hey there,

Let’s cut to the chase: your inbox is probably tired of getting flooded with random crypto updates that don’t really matter. We get it. That’s why we’re here to offer you something different.

Introducing Crypto News, Without the Noise — the newsletter that respects your time and your inbox. We only send you the news that’s actually worth your attention, and we promise never to spam you.

Here’s what you’ll get:

• Market analysis so sharp it could cut through FUD like a hot knife through butter
• Memes that will make you laugh, we promise
• A weekly “Coin Roast” where we mercilessly mock the latest shitcoin and their shenanigans

What more can you ask for?

And look, we know you’ve got options. But are those other newsletters written by people who’ve actually touched grass in the last 5 years? Didn’t think so.

So what are you waiting for?